I present for your consideration this log. Although new to the log collecting community, I was fortunate enough to acquire this log from a venerable collector/dealer. I believe he received the log from the original owner.It should be noted that this log is a genuine wooden log, and to the best of my knowledge, comes from a tree. I have been told that similar logs have been sold at auction for prices up to and even exceeding forty-two or forty-three dollars.

The log is available for pick-up in the Los Angeles area, or will be shipped to your location in appropriate air-cushioned, double boxed packaging.

FAQ:

Q: How old is this log you are selling?

A: If you are referring to the age of the tree from which this log originated, it appears to be between 29 to 31 years (fairly young for a log). If you are…more
Q: Will this log work with Windows XP?

A: That is a silly question. Nothing works with Windows XP. Thanks for your interest.

Q: Is the log made of firewood? if not, do you have any firewood logs?

A: Hello – I’m not familiar with “fire” wood. Although new to the log collecting community, I have heard stories about wealthy collectors…more
Q: Does it work?

A: Yes, the photos in the listing are of the actual log being auctioned, not catalog shots. You are seeing the log in use in these photos.

This log actually SOLD for 4.11 PLUS 18 dollars in shipping. I live very close to a whole forest full of logs. If you are in need of one, drop me a line and we can work something out!

1) Post a note about a blogger you would like to see something wonderful happen for. Maybe one whose posts have touched your heart in one way or another. Include details as to why you admire them and what you wish for them. Be as supporting and affirming as you can.

In a recent Post, Mr.Fab touched me with his dorky acceptance of his unfortunate affliction known as early balding, and yet.. I often feel he is crying out for us to help him overcome that same baldness. This is especially telling when he talks of his bloglover Avitable, who has a hair problem of quite another variety. I often wake, Sweating and naked in the middle of the night , convinced I have the solution only to have it slip through my fingers. All I can recall of the dream is Avitable, scissors and a purple dildo. I’m positive that If I can figure this puzzle out, I can save Fab’s Poor naked head.

What I guess I am trying to say, is that If I had it in my power to make something wonderful happen to Fab, I would get off my ass, brush the cat and mail him a toupee. Wait. That is within my powers.. oops. I’m forgetting The Lazy again..nevermind

2) Post your favorite memory around selflessness, giving, or doing for others. Something that has actually changed you.

I feel that the most selfless thing I have ever done is allow three children to exit VIA my vagina. It has most definitely changed me ~ and not for the good. For example; each one left me with ten extra pounds to carry. Mostly on my ass. And the stretch marks.are only fun so long as the markers are washable. And the fact that the Local Scout troop now uses my Vagina for meetings? The only good that comes from that is the cookie crumbs left over for Hubs to enjoy.

Kids and Vagina’s are not a good mix. Learn from my mistake people.

3) As a postscript, name one thing you will actually do for someone in your life before December 31 that is born out of joy.

This.

This I did for my father. He has to give them to the people he works with – in such a way that it does not result in a pending sexual harassment suit against him -  It brought me joy and it better damn well bring him Joy when I give them to him tomorrow!

4) Tag 3 other bloggers who will play the game and find the spirit. Don’t forget to leave a comment on their blog so they continue to share the good feelings.

Uhm

You. and You. And YOU.

Also, In case anyone is interested, Our video for the Bed In A Box Commercial can be found here. The first person to mention how fat my ass looks gets golf balls thrown at their head. They say the camera adds ten pounds, and in this case, all ten went to my butt. In real life it looks nothing like that!

Pee Ess: Thanks for all your great Video Ideas!

God I miss my blogger template.

So With the help of Nobody, and by that I mean he did all the work while I played bubble shooter, Bluepaintred is OFF blogger and onto wordpress.

Let’s see how this goes then, eh?

The Cool and wonderful Shelli tagged me for this one!

What kind of SOAP is in your bathtub right now? Wow. Getting kind of personal and it’s only the first question! The means I use to clean my insertable amusement park is really none of your business!

Do you have any watermelon in your refrigerator? Uhm. No. Should I? Watermelons are very, very big. And messy. Oh and they are also a summer food. DUH.

What would you change about your living room? I would either put up a mirrored ceiling or move the cable jack to a different wall.

Are the dishes in your dishwasher clean or dirty? Clean. Thank God you didn’t ask about the ones in the sink.

What is in your fridge? Defrosting rats, Penicillin, you know, all the normal fridge type things.

White or wheat bread? Gold bars. I would have also accepted chocolate chips.

What is on top of your refrigerator? Air. Dusty air.

What color or design is on your shower curtain? Glass. What’s with all the questions about me being wet and naked? You some kinda stalker?

How many plants are in your home? Other than the penicillian in the fridge? None. Plants are for people who care.

Is your bed made right now? Heh. You’re trying to picture me in it aren’t you? FYI. My socks don’t match and I have no panties on. Did that help?

Comet or Soft Scrub? Chocolate chips, but I would have also accepted Gold Bars.

Is your closet organized? I have closets? Great. Nine AM and I am already at my limit of learnable knowledge for the day. I hope you’re happy now. *shakes head*

Can you describe your flashlight? Uhm. It’s kinda yellowish,three X three inches wide/tall, made of wax, it has a string thingy. Often dusty.

Do you drink out of glass or plastic most of the time at home? Porcelain. I find the water is cooler that way. And I love pushing down that little handle!

Do you have iced tea made in a pitcher right now? Is the concept of Winter that hard for you? When it is cold outside, you drink coffee, when it is hot outside, you drink coffee. Gawd. It’s not that hard. Maybe you should write that down?

If you have a garage, is it cluttered? Are you offering to clean it out? If so, will you blow out the water lines at the same time too?

Curtains or blinds? Neither. I feel better when I know people are watching.

How many pillows do you sleep with? Four. Two regular sized super plushysoft, one body pillow, and some dudes shoulder. Dunno who he is, It’s always dark when I use him.

Do you sleep with any lights on at night? DARK. As in the absence of light. Effin morons..

How often do you vacuum? lets see, there are 365 days in a year, so thats like 51, no, 52 weeks, divide by eighteen is eleven, no 2, add the number of rooms that have carpet and NONE ya dipshit. Vacuums are for carpets and I shave!

Standard toothbrush or electric? The sleek, engineer designed, aerodynamic turbo seven hundred, eight thousand RPM, operates with nineteen Dcell batteries.

What color is your toothbrush? I don’t have a toothbrush.

Do you have a welcome mat on your front porch? No. And that means YOU.

What is in your oven right now? If there is anyfuckingthing in my oven, My doctor is going to have a LOT of explaining to do!

Is there anything under your bed? yes. A floor, then a basement, then some dirt. Or maybe rocks. If you keep going under, eventually you will hit lava, so that’s pretty cool, right?

Chore you hate doing the most? All of the above. Are you taking notes yet?

What retro items are in your home? Are you calling me old? Fuck you. Get out of here. I can handle you ignoring then not welcome mat, but name calling is just not needed!

Do you have a separate room that you use as an office? Who in their right mind would bring work HOME? I wouldn’t. Plus having a job would suck ass, and I am definitely not into ass sucking. Wait. Is there chocolate in the home office? Can I change my answer?

How many mirrors are in your home? Mirrors are just another way for the government to watch you while you bathe. We have six hundred and ninety seven.

Do you have any hidden emergency money around your home? In Canada we use rocks as currency. Rocks belong outside or in your pants.

What color are your walls? We tore out the walls to make room for the mirrors.

Do you keep any kind of protection weapons in your home? Does a broadsword count? We mostly use it for kinky things, but it is darn sharp..

What does your home smell like right now? I have a cold.

Favorite candle scent? There is nothing like sitting in a warm fuzzy blanket, a hot cup of coffee in one hand and a good book in the other, enjoying the aroma of boiling cat urine.

What kind of pickles (if any) are in your refrigerator right now? Why are you so certain I am Pregnant? Seriously? It’s just a little water weight, I swear!

What color is your favorite Bible? The bibles in our house are very shy. I’ve never actually seen one, though I hear they come out at night to forage for food. If I ever manage to see one of those elusive little suckers, I will make a point to note the color!

Ever been on your roof? As in HOHOHO you fat sob? Well guess who’s been blowing Claus all year long- and tonight I am making sure you go down on the naughty list for calling me fat. AGAIN!

Do you own a stereo? If I had a stereo, would I be sitting here typing to you? I thought not!

How many TVs do you have? Closed circuit or other?

How many house phones? Two and three quarters, but you can blame the cat for that one!

Do you have a housekeeper? Yes. Her name is Mrs. Smokpey, and she only does floors. I’m not sure I like her choice of scrubbing agent (it smells vaguely like urine) but who am I to question, as long as she does the job well.

What style do you decorate in? I like long walks on the beach, cuddling in the moonlight and de-striping zebras.

Do you like solid colors in furniture or prints? I prefer the cardboard variety.

Is there a smoke detector in your home? Yes. The kids think it is a dinner bell becuase it goes off ever night when I Open the oven to take out dinner.

In case of fire, what are the items in your house which you’d grab if you only could make one quick trip? If I am wearing a bra, my laptop, but if there is no support happening for the girls, I would have to grab grab them. Running makes things bounce in an uncomfortable manner dontcha know.

(start copy)

Remember when we were kids and at every opportunity, some adult would have us play that silly Telephone game? You know… the one where the lead person comes up with a sentence or statement, whispers it into the ear of the next person in line, and the sentence is passed from person to person until it reaches the end of the line. The last person then repeats the sentence out loud, the first person announces what it actually was, and everyone gets to laugh about how goofy it got by being passed from ear to ear and being altered because of mispronunciations and hearing ability.

Of course I realize that the game was simply a means for adults to keep us in line while we were waiting for something or killing time. Haven’t we even now as adults, tried to use it on our own kids?

Being the silly kind of fracas that I am, I’ve decided to create an internet version of the game, and use it as an opportunity for link-getting. Everyone wants links, and yet lots of people I know, prefer to get their links in a non-obvious kind of way. We’ve all done the “copy this list and create a post and you’ll get links” type of tag… at least once, but most of us don’t want to fill our blogs with those posts. It may get links, but eventually will chase readers away.

This is a fun way to give your readers something entertaining to read and get a few links too.

Instructions:

If you’ve been tagged, check the last entry on the list. Copy this entire post, add your name and link to the end of the list, copy the sentence in the previous person’s entry and change ONE word in it to try and change the meaning of the sentence for your entry. Name and link only ONE person to tag and then post the whole thing as a new entry in your own blog. Please make sure to transfer all the links to your post otherwise you aren’t providing fair linkage to the people before you. Although this will take longer to get around, by tagging only one person you will avoid making mass enemies by having to tag many people, and it will also guarantee only one true version of the game is circulating out there. Fracas, the creator, will attempt to keep tabs on the game and periodically report on it.

Please try not to tag someone you see is already on the list. If you’re on the list, have been tagged again by someone who didn’t pay attention to the instructions and you don’t want to do another turn, please leave a comment at this post over at Fracas, and Fracas will take your turn for you in order to keep the list going.

1. Fracas – http://fracas.wordpress.com writes:
Never continue dating anyone who is rude to the waiter.

2. Mark @ Blogitude – http://www.blogitude.com/ writes:
Never continue dating anyone who is nude to the waiter.

3. Wiggy @ http://damewigginsoflee.wordpress.com writes:
Forever continue dating anyone who is nude to the waiter.

4. Froggy @ The Road Less Traveled – http://froglette79.wordpress.com writes:
Forever continue dating anyone who is nude under the waiter.

5. InTheFastLane@ That’s Life – http://thatslifev2.blogspot.com writes:
Forever continue dating anyone who is nude under the water.

6. Treadmillista @ Just Treadmilling Around – http://treadmillinginplace.blogspot.com/ writes:
Forever continue dating everyone who is nude under the water.

7. Christine @ Watch Me! No, Watch Me! – http://watchmenowatchme.blogspot.com/ writes:
Forever continue watching everyone who is nude under the water.

8. Candace @ not that i don’t love my kids – http://notthatidontlovemykids.blogspot.com/ writes:
Forever continue scratching everyone who is nude under the water.

9. Fracas – http://fracas.wordpress.com writes:
Forever avoid scratching everyone who is nude under the water.

10. Bluepaintred – http://www.bluepaintred.com writes:

Never avoid scratching everyone who is nude under the water.

Drum roll please!

.

.

.

I tag Shelli, cus she loves meme’s!

Go click “Blogroll” over there in my side bar.

Are you on it?

Want to be?

Please leave me our blog name and link in the comments.

All links are welcome

• Sheila wrote about an intense time in her life. She broke it into four parts, 1, 2, 3, 4. I wanna take this opportunity to tell her I will be nominating part one (and if they let me, 2, 3, and 4,) for a Perfect Post award.

• Baby Ashlyn and her momma went to a party this weekend. Happy Birthday Little J! – Not linking this one. You have to be a member to read it anyway!

• My husband is running around killing flies with an electric fly zapper thing. Its annoyingly hilarious. I hope he zaps himself.
• I’m Having my very first contest over at my newest blog, Where Was I. Go enter it! Ignore how it looks right now. I’m hoping to eventually get the template I ordered in July installed. Someday. Maybe.

• I put new pictures up at the photo blog. Again, mostly the cat.

• Every time I think of the puppy I shiver and have an internal SQUEEE. Sometimes the internal becomes an external.

• I finished the last of the pillows for the bedroom, bought material for the binding, go the backing ready, as well as half of the border. Project Polka Dot is almost done!

• My ” ” key is a fucking asshole. See. BBBBBBBb bbb bb fucker. Work dammit!

• I really want to be in the bath right now.

That’s it. That’s all. It’s either deal with Bullet points or listen to me tell you shit like this : We went shopping. We bought food. Lots of grapes. they were on sale. same with cheese strings. And the yellow poly-cotton in the exact shade I needed was on sale too. I Love sales. A lot. The two youngest brats pestered me about their bikes. I reminded them about how scared I was every time they asked and then repeated not ’til spring. It made the baby cry. I forgot to give a damn. We bought season Six of Smallville. I love Smallville. We watched two episodes tonight. They rocked. I have to pee.

See. Told you bullets are better for your health than Me on a Saturday night. Y’all just considered suicide to get out of reading that last bit didn’t you. Don’t lie.

I’m gonna go get wet n nekked now.

see ya.