You’re the Internet, right?

I’ve heard that the interwebs can sometimes band together in times of desperate need and help a fellow internetter.

I need your help.

I went to see my doctor today, and not just becuase he has a nice ass, either, but becuase I needed his help. Well, He so very helpfully gave me a ninety dollar prescription that, while it might help, has a few… troubling side effects.

And I’m not even talking about the fact that Cancer is a possible side effect – no really – I’ll show you!

Oye. it’s a bit blurry but if you squint to the left and do the hula you will be able to make it out. Cancer.

And yet, that not my issue. Thats not my beef. Well not right NOW, anyway.

What I need help with, is this ;

Yeah. it’s itchy. For the record I  would like to state that my skin is crawling with the itchiness from HELL. And so, I would like to request that one, or two, or several hundred of you begin at my toes and gnaw my skin off ASAP.

Not.Joking.

BITE ME INTERNETS

∗ Posted by bluepaintred on 01.06.2009
∗ Uncategorized

Comments: 16

  1. Try Sarna Lotion.

    Dave2s last blog post..Snowplowed

    Comment by Dave2 - January 6, 2009 10:52 pm

  2. Bathe in Benadryl. Or drink large quantities of Tequila.

    Comment by Nobody™ - January 6, 2009 10:55 pm

  3. The pink stuff… Calamine Lotion? They make it clear now.

    Sheilas last blog post..Which Way Do We Go?

    Comment by Sheila - January 6, 2009 10:56 pm

  4. Aveno oatmeal baths… or something like that…

    Comment by Fantastagirl - January 6, 2009 10:58 pm

  5. Dear very helpful NON CHEWERS – I actually cannot put anything on my skin, nothing, nada, not one damn thing. Although, why I did not think to take a freaking antihistamine pill is beyond my comprehension. I will blame it on the fact that I’m pretty sure even my brain is itching!

    Comment by bluepaintred - January 6, 2009 10:59 pm

  6. Listen, at the worst of my rash, I was willing to have someone chew off my skin.

    And, geez, if you know the answer to your problem, why are you so angry with all of us? :twisted:

    Sheilas last blog post..Which Way Do We Go?

    Comment by Sheila - January 6, 2009 11:04 pm

  7. well.. your cousin has a diploma in pharmacology… fyi.. msg me :p
    i could possibly help you out in the wonderful land of druggeries…

    just cause i’m that awesome..

    i hear slurpees and chocolate solve EVERYTHING

    Kristis last blog post..hOckEy

    Comment by Kristi - January 6, 2009 11:17 pm

  8. Wouldn’t it be easier to just have someone pee on you….wait that’s for jelly fish stings….nevermind.

    Trukindogs last blog post..JESSE’S STICKS

    Comment by Trukindog - January 6, 2009 11:54 pm

  9. I have nothing for you – not one shred of advice (helpful, I KNOW) but this reminds me of a time, back in 1991 when going to a tanning booth was so IN. My SIL and I decided we’d go for a double tanning session – we’re both fair skinned redheads – uh, ya. Now, mind you, when we came out of there, we didn’t LOOK like we were burned, but we were. That night, my ASS became so itchy (because of course I was naked while tanning – don’t want nasty tan lines ya know), I asked my husband to take a knife and peel off the top layer of my skin. He didn’t, but I thought I would die from the itch. I didn’t die, uh, obviously, because HERE I AM, but it sucked. And sure, my story doesn’t help your itching one bit, other than to say that, you will probably live. I’m telling you, I SHOULD have become a frigging doctor.

    Sassys last blog post..I killed my husband. IN.MY.MIND.

    Comment by Sassy - January 7, 2009 12:00 am

  10. Did the antihistamine work? Because that would have been my suggestion. Is this effect supposed to pass?

    Finns last blog post..Covetous

    Comment by Finn - January 7, 2009 9:16 am

  11. pramagel and antihistamines.

    I don’t think I’d take medicine with worse side effects than probably what’s actually wrong.

    Comment by Miss Ann Thrope - January 7, 2009 10:25 am

  12. Hope the antihistamine kicked in. I’d gnaw your skin off for you, but I’m in the process of kicking the habit of chewing on my own cuticles–gross, yeah–and fear falling off the wagon. Which would be a TOTAL shame because I just got my nails filled this morning and my hands look nice for a change.
    Sorry, dude, ya caught me on a selfish day.
    Keep roaring at us if it makes you feel better–we’re tough; we can take it.

    phinzs last blog post..We’re All In The Same Boat

    Comment by phinz - January 7, 2009 2:07 pm

  13. nom nom nom! Howzat?

    You could always put mittens on the boys and let them scritch!

    Comment by metalmom - January 7, 2009 2:21 pm

  14. Oatmeal? I don’t know :( I’ve never been very itchy before :( I’m sorry! I hope you can get it under control soon!

    Sarcasticas last blog post..I’ve not yet said the word vaginally on this blog

    Comment by Sarcastica - January 7, 2009 2:57 pm

  15. Oh dear. Being Itchy totally sucks! I hope you get some relief soon.

    Twisted Cinderellas last blog post..Wordless Wednesday — Sleepy Girl Snuggling with Daddy

    Comment by Twisted Cinderella - January 7, 2009 7:14 pm

  16. Yes, I am the Internet and as such I do not have teeth. Sorry.

    Marilyns last blog post..Today’s Post: A really random list

    Comment by Marilyn - January 7, 2009 7:42 pm

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