*stomp*

(note: this is the first time I have ever understood why some people say “be sure to click on the picture, it looks better big” becuase you cannot see the actual photograph, and why it is so well done, when it is this small.)

It’s just not fair!

This morning I asked Parker(8) to snap a few pictures of my apple tree – the blossoms opened early this morning. I will say, in my defense, that when Parker took his photos, it was not windy at all, but when I went out later in the afternoon to snap a few, there was both a hurricane and tornado, and I think maybe an earthquake all happening at the same time. Thats the ONLY reason my pictures did not turn out. ONLY.REASON.

In the first photo, Parker has a nice bokeh going on, AND you can bet your bottom dollar he has no idea how he did it. I’ve spent the last week struggling with aperture, focal length and speed and have yet to get this result. Except in Photoshop. Then its the click of a button and I can blur out the background. AND whiten your teeth!

In the second picture he got down on his butt and took it looking up. He did not like the previous picture with the house in it, and liked the ones with cars in it even less. On one hand, I want to say look at this motherfucking kid! He can take pictures! With a motherfucking camera! In a motherfucking artistic manner! What a motherfucking awesome kid*!

But the other hand is itching to slap him becuase it never occurred to me to change the angle I shot the picture in to get rid of the cars – oh no – instead, I’ve been spending hours and hours blurring and erasing offending cars and people. Fucker.

Now. lets take a look at MY pictures. And, it would make me feel a lot better if you did NOT click on them to make them bigger. Thats considered fair warning in these parts.

I call this one Ooops! visible Fingers!

Lets call this one : What the hell! Where did those leaves come from??

Oh look! Blurry AND visable fingers, and to be frankly honest, it just got worse from here on out. Eventually I gave up on the flowers and started taking pictures of Smokey.

Oh fuck this shit! I quit.

* this won’t make a lick of sense unless you have seen this

∗ Posted by bluepaintred on 05.19.2008
∗ Uncategorized

Comments: 14

  1. Clearly the kid is a lot more talented than you are.

    Mr. Fabulous’s last blog post..Life is SO unfair!

    Comment by Mr. Fabulous - May 20, 2008 3:41 am

  2. I see someone was very busy or at least needs a new camera.

    Robin’s last blog post..Breasts For Dinner

    Comment by Robin - May 20, 2008 6:04 am

  3. LOL! You should ask him for some pointers.

    Re: Blurry backgrounds — what is the lowest aperture setting on your camera? Some lenses cannot open wide enough to give you a really blurry background. Therefore it would be the camera, not you.

    Finn’s last blog post..Burning Questions, Part II: A Conversation With God

    Comment by Finn - May 20, 2008 7:39 am

  4. Heh! Go with him! Appoint him the official house photographer!

    Hand him the camera sometime with no assignment and see what happens.

    I got a roll of film with pics of my two children wearing nothing but their underwear in weggie style….. Sumo wrestlers they explained later. Summer Olympics had been playing when the idea struck them. :lol:

    DeeJay’s last blog post..Polaroid Tuesday

    Comment by DeeJay - May 20, 2008 8:59 am

  5. @Mr. Fabulous – maybe in photography, but dammit! I’m a much better woman than he is!

    @Robin – heh. I take about 50-100 pictures a day. every day. I’m obsessive like that. and I have three different kinds of cameras do do it with!

    @Finn -i wish I could blame it on that, but my Kodak will go down to 1.8. sigh

    @DeeJay – I sent you an email, parker has his own camera, he takes awesome pictures!

    Comment by bluepaintred - May 20, 2008 10:21 am

  6. He gets it from me. ;)

    Sheila’s last blog post..Wow

    Comment by Sheila - May 20, 2008 10:52 am

  7. @Sheila – Hrumph! Figures. Go look at my last two twitters, the pictures!

    Comment by bluepaintred - May 20, 2008 10:59 am

  8. The kid has a natural talent for photography.
    I have a brother like that: he takes photographs, I take snapshots. :sad:

    Comment by Peggy - May 20, 2008 12:15 pm

  9. @Peggy – he takes photographs, I take snapshots. Oh I LIKE that! Thats exactly what happens!

    Comment by bluepaintred - May 20, 2008 2:04 pm

  10. It’s not you…it’s the camera. I’m assuming it’s a point and shoot camera – no? P&S have a hard time doing fuzzy backgrounds. At f/1.8, you should be getting a nice bokeh – well you would on an SLR for sure. P&S have a heard time focusing on anything close up.

    Jen’s last blog post..Happy Mother?s Day, Silently

    Comment by Jen - May 20, 2008 4:47 pm

  11. @Jen – It is a P&S, but most of my troubles would have been solved had I been using my tripod. I very, VERY, rarely take it out! I LOVED the flower photo from your link!

    Comment by bluepaintred - May 20, 2008 5:58 pm

  12. Thanks. I totally disagree with you though…great bokeh doesn’t require a tripod. That flower shot on my blog was freehand. I very rarely use a tripod. It’s all about aperture and shutter speed! :)

    Let’s discuss over coffee in Manitoba some time! LOL!!!

    Comment by Jen - May 20, 2008 6:26 pm

  13. Beautiful picture Parker!

    Pan got a hold of our digital camera when he was almost 3. The pictures were just amazing because it was from his viewpoint – our house looked HUGE! Lately though when he borrows the digital camera – he uses the video feature and takes video of tink trying to fly.

    Fantastagirl’s last blog post..It’s 8:00 PM

    Comment by Fantastagirl - May 20, 2008 8:15 pm

  14. Kids have an honestly-earned more artistic eye. Why? Because they’re not fucked up with grownup perspectives yet. They think outside the box.

    Karl’s last blog post..Ups and Downs

    Comment by Karl - May 20, 2008 9:20 pm

Comments RSS

Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.